Been porch pondering in the porch swing today under a homemade vanilla ice cream colored overcast sky, non descriptive, no layers of grey or blue. Mid-day the cloud cover gave a little space for the blue sky to peek through but not long enough for the sun to show herself. I watched a few layers of grey wisps and a few very, very delicate pink clouds float over the horizon till the grey clouds gathered hands and covered the sky.

The birds were so pretty today and are singing their songs of the coming spring. Something, hoping it wasn’t a raccoon, knocked one of the lady den feeders off the pole and broke one of the perches. I’m hoping Fatty Squirrel jumped from the window sill and did it. Don’t want another raccoon visiting my yard.

Found a new color yesterday when I was checking how to spell haint. There is a collection of blue paint colors called haint blue, colors used to paint the porch ceilings of Southern homes. The blue ceiling is thought to keep haints, and wasps, and spiders away. My porch ceiling is brown, need to change that! Anyway, at sunset today the clouds were a perfect haint blue and kept the sunset pageant away.

The late afternoon sunset stage was covered by curtains of haint blue and the sun and Father Sky were hidden as they strolled down the horizon. The sun had earlier peeked through the clouds dressed in a formal gown of sparkling sterling silver. When she stepped on stage, the edge of the horizon was colored in brush strokes of soft blue and cauliflower white as Mother Nature painted a backdrop for twilight. The day ended in bird songs and the sun turned out the day’s light. Father Sky waked the waning gibbous moon and hung him high on the black velvet canvas of night and surrounded him with twinkling stars to help guide the night travelers. The night begins and the day ends.

Been thinking about my widowed friends today and the families who have lost children recently. So many sad stories on the news and on the internet of families in pain from the loss of loved ones. Life is so sweet but so fragile. We’re never promised tomorrow and when grief comes from the loss of a cherished loved one that grief takes a strong hold over our lives and turns our lives upside down and inside out. The sun keeps rising, the birds keep singing, and the world keeps turning while we stumble tearfully down a rocky new path.

Eventually we learn to put one foot in front of the other and walk toward the warmth of God’s love. The walk, into the sunshine of living again, takes a long time. Some folks walk faster than others, some stumble on the path for rest of their life. We hold our grief tightly in our hands till we begin to slowly let it go and with hope we begin to live again. We forever walk a different path, our lives irreversibly changed, but happiness eventually blooms and the memories of our loved one comfort us.

Losing a loved one helps clarify what’s important to us and opens us to a new appreciation of our loved ones and helps us to offer understanding and comfort to others who are grieving. Through our faith in God we look forward to a reunion with our loved ones in heaven. Mourning is a part of life and in the darkness of mourning we should reach out to Jesus for comfort through our faith. There is always hope of better days ahead in the sunshine of God’s peace and understanding.

I love this short poem about faith by Emily Dickinson. “Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without words and never stops at all.”

“I could only be grateful when I realized that I would rather have known you for a moment than never at all. I would rather endure this inexplicable pain of outliving you than to have never seen your face, spoken your name. I would rather be yours, you be mine, regardless. Regardless of the sorrow, the sleepless nights, and the years I will walk this earth, carrying you in my heart.” — Lexi Berhndt