Sat outside this afternoon. The sun was warm on my face in the swing. Penelope took a siesta in her playpen. The sky was a pretty clear blue. Just a few pastel stick swipes of white clouds. The gluttonous, beautiful goldfinches are cleaning out the feeders as fast as I fill them up. I don’t mind, their happy chattering reminds me of Rosie and makes me smile. She was always such a happy child, singing and whistling. She had a beautiful voice.

Oldest brother came by for his visit and told me he finally “broke down” and bought a pot of the miniature pansies at Wally World. Course I had to go to his truck and look at them. So pretty! The blooms were light bluish/purple with dark purple centers. They were all standing at attention showing off when he opened the truck door. I think they heard him talking about the Miracle Grow they were getting when he got the pot home. I might have to “break down” and get me a pot, too.

We were eating supper tonight and I started talking about how good the pork chops were. Stew looked at me and said, “Mama, you do know we’re eating hamburger steaks, don’t you!” “Yeah, course I know that!’ I knew as soon as I said pork chop I knew it was the wrong word. Ever do that? Hope you are saying yes and that you’ve looked for your phone while talking on it, and looked for your glasses while wearing them. It’s those kinda things that get us packed up to Shady Oaks. Got three friends on my list for Shady Oaks. Let me know if anybody else wants to go. We have to agree to share our snacks, candy, and our fridge of glass bottle cokes. And you have to bring doggie bacon treats to share with our mutts.

Chief had a dear friend in a nursing home. She chose assisted living, she told me, so she wouldn’t be a burden to her children. We used to take our children frequently to visit her. I’d always say I didn’t want to end up in a nursing home cause you might crave a candy bar or a Coke and couldn’t have them. She points to the little fridge by her bed and no kidding, it was filled with glass bottle cokes and she had a big basket of candy on top of the fridge. She didn’t even have to get out of the bed to get a Coke! Hope Shady Oaks is as accommodating! Or I ain’t going. Better have doublemint chewing gum in my snack basket!

I’m sitting on the porch now pondering on my childhood and some of the things I did, that should have gotten me a whipping, but I snuck them by my parents. Our next door neighbors were older and had a tin roof on their house. My cousin, Blake Shaffer, and I went on a marble hunting trip through my room and snuck over to the house and threw double handfuls of marbles on the roof and then high tailed it home to hide on the porch and see what would happen. The older man ran outside to see what the noise was. Those marbles danced all over the roof and we laughed ourselves silly. My daddy would have “torn me up” if he had caught us doing that. Lots of times when I walk Penelope through that yard I smile remembering Blake and his crazy antics. Maybe I’ll run up on a marble one day.

When I was in the fifth grade I told my teacher I had to go to the dentist and that daddy told me to walk home and he’d pick me up there. Times then were so innocent, course she let me walk home. I went downstairs and sat down to watch soap operas with my grandmother, Big Ma. My daddy came home later and asked Big Ma if she had seen me. She lied and said no. I was hiding under her bed. His wing tip shoes were an inch from my nose. I knew he knew I was there. Long story short, he pulled me out from under the bed, marched me back to school and popped me on the butt three times in front of the class. Didn’t have anymore dentist appointments during school after that!

When I was a teenager I came home from band practice an hour after my baby brother got home from band practice. When I came in the door my daddy was sending my older brothers out to look for me. Didn’t do that again, either.

When I was getting ready to take my driving test I asked my daddy could I practice parallel parking in front of our house. He said to wait till he came home from work and he’d help me. Well, you know teenagers don’t wait, so I pulled my grandmother’s car up the drive way to the street and made a place for me to practice parking. First time I tried, I bammed right into the back passenger door of my grandmother’s car. Dented the door in. I about had a heart attack! Could not even breathe it scared me so bad. Then I remembered I saw something one time about using a plunger to take a dent out of a car door. Thank God it worked! When daddy came home from work he asked me if I wanted to practice and I said no. No one ever knew but me what I did.

My generation had such an innocent childhood, riding our bicycles around town, playing in the creek, swimming in a pool in the middle of a hay field, roller skating down the sidewalks up town. We just hopped on our bikes, went on our merry way, and listened for the mill whistle to blow at 12 noon to tell us it was time for lunch. Did not have to worry about the creek water being contaminated or scary people snatching us off our bikes. We didn’t even have to worry about pocket money if we could round up some glass bottles to cash in at the grocery store. I think I worried most about “mad dogs” and being abducted by aliens.

The respect the world had during that time is something our world needs to take a lesson on now. Chief said when he was little he said something disrespectful about the president and his grandfather lectured him on how you don’t have to like the president or agree with the president but you do have to respect him in the office of president. Remember how policemen, firemen, teachers, preachers, doctors and dentists… and community leaders were respected in communities. Children respected them and children looked up to them. We said “yes mam” and “no mam” and please and thank you. We worked for things and didn’t just think we were entitled to them. If we got in trouble at school we got in more trouble at home. Wish we could bring those innocent times back.

I had an idyllic, carefree childhood and I appreciate it more every day.

Gonna define respect so maybe we can spread the definition around and then I’m going to hush. Respect — a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.