I’m sitting in the lady den drinking a cup of hot chocolate from a pretty red cardinal mug, four marshmallows floating on the top, a peppermint stick to stir. Want some good hot chocolate, use the recipe on the back of the Hershey cocoa powder box.

I’m in Christmas mode decorating for my family’s Christmas dinner on Saturday. There are almost 40 of us now and we have a wonderful time. Our families little ones just make the holidays special with their sparkling eyes and Santa Claus excitement. I’ve been collecting Christmas china since I was a teenager and I love setting the tables and making everything festive.

Realized this year I could not climb a ladder so I’ve calmed down on my garland hanging. Years ago my mother had beautiful place cards made for the dining tables and I’ve been weaving them in a large garland around the entrance to the dining room for years. Gonna put the garland down the center of the dining room table this year. Well, maybe not, I can’t find the place cards. I’ll keep looking for them tomorrow.

The day is very wintry looking, an overcast sky of melted white chocolate, full of grays and dark purples, spitting out a cold rain. Walked Penelope and she wasn’t dawdling today. The rain felt thick like sleet but that’s just my childlike hope of a snow flurry. I know it’s not cold enough for anything. The wind is really blustery. I’m watching the bamboo forest dance and jostle each other to the happy tintinnabulations of my porch’s wind chimes’ symphony. Penelope is snoring in my lap. I’m taking a break from my chores waiting for the Advil to kick the knee pain away. Been too busy to watch the birds but I know the cardinals are visiting the feeders.

I’ve had a good day and searched for a quote that’s just right. “Never regret a day in your life: good days give happiness, bad days give experience, worst days give lessons, and the best days give memories.” That’s a great quote but it’s unknown in origin. Good days give us feelings of happiness and contentment. I had good days with the grandchildren and stored up all the memories of the happy times.

I think being content is what makes us appreciate the moments of great joy and happiness. We can’t be happy all the time. We choose paths in our lives that lead to happy moments. The experiences we go through during the bad moments of our lives help us to grow and learn from past mistakes. We are molded into the person we are through the ups and downs of our lives. Life is not stagnant, change is a constant.

Been thinking about what I would say has been the worst day of life I’ve experienced during my 67 years and I’d have to say it was the phone call on Sunday morning 21 years ago telling me Rosie had died in a car wreck. I know without God’s grace, our faith, and many, many prayers, Chief and I could not have navigated through the nightmare of her death. Her death strengthened our faith and our marriage.

I had so much anger at God. Her death really shattered my faith. How could God let the car run off the road, a fence post breaking through the windshield, killing her instantly by blunt force trauma to the chest. She wasn’t speeding and was wearing her seat belt according to the state troopers. She just jerked the car back on the road too quickly when she ran off the edge of the road on a horseshoe curve.

I kept trying to figure out why God was punishing me. What could I have done in my life that was so terrible that God felt the need to take my child to punish me. Chief finally told me, “Mama, God didn’t push the car off the road, it was just an accident.” Just an accident, that statement started me back on the road to my faith in God and taught me how to lay my burdens in God’s hands through prayer. I am so thankful that my faith is strong enough to know I’ll see her and Chief again. I have no fears of death, why should I? God doesn’t cause bad things to happen and he’s there with us even when we make bad choices or tread a treacherous path. He gives us the strength to bear our worst days. His love is constant and steadfast.

Isaiah 41:10 says, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” I truly believe if we turn our worries over to God, he will help us. If we can’t control things or change things, we need to put these worries in God’s hands through prayer. He will carry the burdens and give us grace and peace. God’s grace is a gift on our good days and on our bad days. “Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God’s grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God’s grace,” says Scott Smith.

The sun will rise again tomorrow and give us a day to be thankful to God for all our blessings. And another chance to enjoy this beautiful world we live in.

“If you want to be reminded of the love of the Lord, just watch the sunrise.” — Jeannette Walls